Categories
Poetry

I pass those pennies by!

When I was young

I thought I was little.

Spending my time

running to pennies 

on the street 

filling up my pockets

hoping 

to increase my value 

The shiny bits of copper worth 

more than my soul worth

more than my body

 my heart and my mind 

more than my time

But, no way I could 

grow in stature and size

With my pockets 

weighing me down

Now,

I pass those pennies by!

When I will be old

I think I will be

as tall as the tallest mountains

And like the mountains,

Gold will glow in my veins

Remembering facts that even the smartest

Man will forget

Hair will sprout over me like grasses

And like the mountains,

My skin will be

reinvented by the wind, the rivers, 

the ice, and the living things.

Categories
Poetry

Wild Engine

I combust forward

My thinkin’ has been numinous

Mind running like wild engine

Blowing surprise fire geysers 

Into the smoky depths

I’m Constantly

Collecting

.. Callouses ..

I rose above and was never tethered 

I was free just like icarus

Was

Light the fire

 Hug it tight

Prepare for fighting

Break

Break

Break

Fight to win not only the battle

Eyes on winning the war

Napoleon, Alexander

I’m quickest, rawest queen

In all matters.

I can speak it all

My thoughts, my dreams

I’m hungry for victory

Lie to myself before lying to others

Stomping my feet like the angry child

Feeling the earth shake my knees

I’m going to live forever, 

My life is my life.

Categories
Poetry

My Diss Track

I got one question for yah

Before I begin;

Why are you so ugly?

Face crooked like witch

And magic couldn’t fix it

Repellent; Repugnant

Pretty sure your identity

Coincides with Methamphetamine

Bow before me, you’re my peasantry

Meet the real me The real queen

Enough with the pleasantries

I make skeletons

Outta my enemies

You’ll be burnt through

overplayed like Peek and Boo

Clear the color off

your talent palette

You’re just grayscale

A pale comparison

I am cadet using my

Clarinet

Making you sweat

Making good on my

Threat debts like

A soviet based warhead

Halitosis, you smell like

Garlic bread 

But what’s new 

Now you are hungry and scared

 Rigid Like bamboo

Petrified at my corkscrew

You are so ugly,

It looks like your face

Has been sprayed with mace

I wish there was something else

In that space where your face is

Acid in your Basic knowledge

I’ve a PHD in chemistry

Warlady of WWIII

Get off the airwaves and areospace

You were born 

With a Nasty face 

Categories
Essays Opinion

The Wasp Factory by Iain Banks Review

My first thought after reading The Wasp Factory by Iain Banks was ‘What a fascinating muddied depraved book’. It is set on a Scottish island, bare save for Frank, their father, and the housekeeper. I am still not sure if this science fiction book that is definitely a science fiction book is even in fact science fiction at all. I suppose it is. I am forced to believe it, because Banks creates one of the most immersive settings – turning a dreary island into an alien planet, million miles away and Frank- it’s alien. It is definitely an absurd gore thriller. The Wasp Factory doesn’t follow any standard traditional way- bending genre. 

Frank, the psychotic serial killer doesn’t let you out of their sight or save you their brutality. All actions calculated and thought through. Although his brother, Eric, recently escaped from the insane asylum, always seems to call Frank’s house the few times when he is off guard and the absolute craziness that ensues is pure dark comedic gold.

When not resenting his father for being vegetarian and for smelling Frank’s farts and then for commenting on the fragrance; Frank spends his time building dams, maintaining a litany of arms including a flamethrower. Frank reveals the details of his killing with matter-of-factness. Though it is mostly animals that he murders (Banks spares no details) he also includes all of the children that he had killed. 

The Wasp Factory is not for the faint of heart. If you have loved ones, may you stay away from this book forever. That being said I am glad to have read it. I am interested in other works by Banks. As Banks dunks you into his misogynistic nightmare where wasps are used in divination rituals and gruesome violence is the currency; you are glad that you do not have to live in Iain Bank’s head.

Picture of Iain Banks
Picture of Iain Banks

Categories
Essays Opinion Uncategorised

Stuffed & Ready by Cherry Glazerr

Cherry Glazerr’s 2019 album Stuffed & Ready was an altogether turn into unintelligible with few diamonds. Throughout the songs in the album, the brooding guitar was strong and suited the singer’s voice and it’s effect.

Their song Stupid Fish is definitely the best on the album. Its rhythm was soothing. The guitar together with the drumming kept the sense that the music was moving around you as if you were in a warm aquarium. Listening to the music I felt compelled to raise my fists and wiggle like a stupid fish. The sense of melody was well being incarnate

Those facts in mind, I wish that I had gotten more of a sense of what the message of most of their songs were. At times the song got monotonous like in Daddi. I am a big fan of their song Ten Dollars but I fear that I am no longer their audience.

Overall, Stupid Fish is worth mentioning but Cherry Glazerr failed to deliver on their usual slick style on all the over tracks.

Categories
Short Story

Roller-Coaster in Space

Mark only looked up from his game console when the docking space coaster rumbled through his tipped chair. The blast of air blew his dock Jockey ID into his face. Lights flashed on the spaceship as Mark sighed and took his feet off of the display toggle dash. He heaved himself out of his seat. Pulling out a crinkling bag of snacks from his pocket he popped one into his mouth and let the salt melt on his tongue as he jockeyed the docking mechanism.

“Alright, let’s see if you work this time,” he said to himself, his mouth full. He pulled on the lever to the right of the screen and with a hiss and a reverberation that made his chair tremble loudly, it’s straight tooth legs scraping against the metal ground. He heard a snap. Mark winced. The lights turned red. His bag of snacks fell to the ground and blew away.

“Mark!” A voice boomed out over the intercom. “Goddamn it Mark, what in the sam hell do you think are you doing?”

“Listen boss, I’m sorry! It won’t happen again.”

“No more excuses! You! you son of a bitch! you’re fired! This is the third time this week you’ve broken the docking jockey”

“Boss, please listen to me. I need this job,” Mark pleaded as the tourists on the spacecoaster stared from the inside of the space coaster. “I can do better I know it.”

“No way. You are outta here. Turn in your badge and if i ever see you around space hold again-”

“I’ll do anything!” The boss’s speakerphone was quiet for a moment.

“Meet me in my office,” The speakerphone blared out. Mark winced again.  Walking out of the large bay and into the suffocating hallways of the office section; he was acutely aware of the tourists still trapped in the coastership, staring at him and hearing everything. Mark’s cheek worked and his heart pumped as he opened the 

“This is your last chance. Listen, the only reason I’m asking you is that you’re the only one who knows how to spacewalk.”

“Spacewalk?” Mark asked, the color drained from his face.

“Yes, you got a problem with that?”

“N-no sir,” 

“Do you have your certification on you?” Mark nodded and handed his boss the laminated paper that had dated it’s expiration back two years. The boss looked it over, his brow furrowed.

“Looks good to me Mark,” he said gruffly. Mark nodded, his mouth suddenly dry and without feeling took back his expired certification and tucked it into his pocket. “Now get prepped, time is money and profits are flying faster out the window than your job will be if you don’t make up for it.

Mark put on his space gear and sealed it up. The formerly familiar components blinked as Mark traced his fingers across the smooth material. He sat down for a moment, letting his body get used to the highly oxygenated environment of spacewalk suits. 

The edges of his handheld stuck into his hip, as he contemplated the next level of the game that he had yet to beat. He took a deep breath, knowing that this would be the last job that he would be able to be eligible for. It took him months just to book this gig. 

All sound disappeared as he walked out into space. The space coaster tracks jutted out from the body of the main ship which he called home. He went out into empty space and used the grips along the hull of the ship to make the repairs on the faded advertisement saying SPACE FUN CENTER. The paint dripped down his forearms in brilliant streaks of yellow and red and he applied the pigment. After finishing, he packed up his paints and pressed the enter button.

“Congratulations. You get to keep your job,” The boss’s words greeted the panting Mark as he unsealed his suit.

“Thank you sir, I’ll do better sir.” It was the last time that Mark would play video games on the job.

Categories
Essays Short Story

Accepting Madness

We are all submersed! The dueting one-liners peering down at us with a clown-like grin. Assuring us of our unity of the new empire of. (pause) people (look out at the crowd.) where many a memory will be made. A tower of dust in the storm of the interwebs That is we. The legion. Internet, constant connectivity, almost everyone’s engaged. The single most important invention of our age. 

They call some of us zoomers, and we, (ahem) the millennials. We have learned more about the world in a shorter time span Than every person before. Progress has never come without a cost. People are winding up, this tension is breaking like twigs and I just want to be on the right side when the storm hits. Us, All of us, all we have ever wanted was to be good. Paint ourselves in gold stars please put away the stormy clouds, dear. Don’t let yourself drown in fear. We fear fear fear fear for no reason. Just brush off the sinking feelings of fatigue. Acid seems to be wasting away, dripping out of my cochlea and pooling beneath my ear. Maintaining coherent thoughts is difficult when there is so much to process. Saggy mattress blues makes it hard to really get comfortable.

It’s a real trainwreck let me tell you. Makes me feel sleepy but I’m too sleepy to care that I’m not comfortable. I have motivation for nothing but poetry. And I only write poetry when I am sad and that thought makes me depressed.

Categories
Essays

We, the Mindless Masses

There has been a large increase in zombie-related media, video games, movies, TV shows; these reanimated corpses have made countless debuts on society’s stage. Such as the popular T.V show, The Walking Dead which portrays the post-apocalyptic world after the outbreak of zombies. In this world, you either become a zombie or you live in constant fear as a survivor. Zombies have become a giant in pop-culture. Pop-culture, because of it’s commonality and of course, popularity, reflects people’s everyday lives. Society unknowingly choses symbols in order to express its underlying thoughts and attitudes; everything in culture carries connotations that express our identity, unconscious or conscious. And this growth in zombie-based entertainment is a metaphor for the angst of contemporary society.

The definition of angst is according to dictionary.com, “A feeling of dread, anxiety, or anguish,” The uncertainties of the future would create this societal angst, our decay of our individualism  This growth in zombie-based entertainment shows that society is (metaphorically of course) embracing and morphing into what zombies are and everything that zombies represent.What most consumers don’t understand when they go to the stores and shop, is that everything they buy becomes an extension of the self. It becomes a part of our identity once we decide that we like it, that this thing, is ours. 

And this ties in with society’s fascination with zombies, it reveals our underlying psyche, because whatever we yearn for and connect with and therefore attach a part of our identity to, we buy. Zombies, being the unconscious, animate bag of death that it is, are the very embodiment of mindless consumption. They shuffle around, slowly heading toward things that they wish to consume, to become a part of themselves. Zombies are slave to their wants and needs, and in reality, they are like us, only they consume brain: we consume apple products. And society realizes that, either subconsciously or consciously.

Zombies also show how powerless we feel in face of the future. Zombies have no freedom,and they are subject only to their hunger, we see this and we subconsciously connect with them. We connect to zombies through our greed, hunger, and fear- we are hungry for all sorts of things and we consume products to fill the ever growing hole that exists inside all humans. Zombies portray our angst ridden fears, our fear of responsibility, of being alone, and our fear of freedom, by not being conscious, these zombies give us that out that we need. Whether we identify with the zombies or the people who survive them. Zombies, being mindless meat sacks, have no responsibilities but to consume, they are never ever alone, and they are no longer free to make their own choices like humans are. And surviving the zombie apocalypse frees us from the responsibilities that we have currently. If people in this society can’t make their own choices, than they can’t be held accountable for them. And they now have legitimate excuses for making the wrong choices and they don’t have to face the consequences.

Zombies play into the feeling of inauthenticity and loss of individuality that society feels today. Zombies are just mindless mobs, a face in the crowd, we never really hear about the individuals behind the rotting flesh- what they once were. This portrays the underlying thoughts that we are insignificant in the grand scheme of things, or even in the human scheme of things. We are just another number in the mass of a faceless mediocrity. But the fact is, we gravitate toward these games because we are so afraid of our individuality because that means we are alone in the world, we are born alone, and we live alone, and we die alone. But not as zombies, as zombies; we are a collective whole, we are a part of something bigger than ourselves. But really we are simply running away from who we actually are and our problems. 

Through Zombies we hide from existentialism, the basic idea from this philosophy is that the independent person is the only one that can determine the course of their own life. Sartre’s phrase  “Man is condemned to be free.” really sums up the existentialist philosophy. We did not choose to be born, the moment that we are, we are responsible for anything that we do. This is why we conscious beings want to identify with these zombies, we reject that we are conscious beings- capable of making our own decisions and then dealing the with the consequences of those decisions. We refuse to take responsibility for our actions, or rather inactions. And this undercurrent of thought shows in what we buy, in this case, zombie-related media.

The symbols in media show what in essence society’s hopes and thoughts are. Who we see ourselves as, because companies need to sell products and in order to do that they need to connect to their audience. And a big way to do that is to show them who they think they are and what they want. Our angst from our inauthenticity, insignificance, and fear of responsibility and future is shown through the zombie-related media surge.

Categories
Videos

Only Love Matters Music Video

https://youtu.be/79KB_7VIYqs
Categories
Uncategorised

Soul Eater is the Greatest Anime Ever

Soul Eater is more than likely the best anime ever created. It is a fantastic anime that has really good writing and a diverse and well thought out set of characters. These characters possess deep personal backgrounds and help put into context the crazy world in which the writers have deposited us. The main element that this anime gets right is consistency. It is a goofy while simultaneously edgy perspective with out of the box animation style. I think this anime stands out above all the rest because of its plot, world, and overall characters. The writing of the characters themselves is campy but in a way that makes them more endearing, not repulsive. The writers left plenty of comedic effects which is used with a smart hand. These comedic moments are mixed in thoroughly with deeper themes of self-worth, fear, reality, and more.

I have yet to see an anime match its plot complexity and world building (besides Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood of course). Lady Medusa, the Kishin, and the arachnid are fabulous as enemies and really do a lot to drag you to the edge of your seat. The whole setting in which the characters face demons within is a world in which death is anthropomorphized and is the leader of Meister academy. Meisters are young adults whose sole goal is to find kishin eggs and make a scythe for death to use.

The Kishin egg and Kishins are human beings who have given themselves to evil so as to be utterly irredeemable. There are moments of neuroticism and narcissism by the main characters. But these and other failings are addressed in each of the characters. Maka and Soul Eater are fabulous characters who you see their faults but can still root for them. It also has a message at the end of the story that really takes it home. Bravery means to face an impossible to beat foe knowing that you will lose but you do it anyway. The struggle against fear and madness inside your own mind and Kishin’s without.

I love the ensemble feel to the show I think that that was a smart plot development. I think that Black Star and Tsuki and Death the Kid with the twins, and most importantly; Maka and Soul Eater are the heroes that I can root for.